Just a Jew. Named Mitch. Writing about his feelings.

Archive for September, 2010

Atlantic City and the Best Buffet Ever

Posted by JewMitch on September 8, 2010

So if you have been wondering if Atlantic City is going to go bankrupt, I’m pretty sure the answer is yes, because earlier this year Harrah’s Casino offered a deal that absolutely reeked of desperation. For $39 (+$16 taxes and hotel fees) we got a one night stay in a pretty nice room, two passes to the spa, two passes to their club (“The Pool After Dark”), and two passes to the buffet.

The deal was only good on Friday nights; so we made plans to leave work early on Friday so that we could get to the pool early for happy hour. I had gone out really hard the night before, so I thought it prudent to call out of work sick on Friday morning (I was already taking a half day anyway), so that I could sip Pedialyte and catch up on Jersey Shore reruns for a few hours. By noon, I was back to normal and ready to go. The train was great (highly recommended – just remember to book two weeks in advance to save $20), but the hotel, pool, and almost everything else about Atlantic City, aside from the buffet, was awful.

For some reason the hotel decided to build the entire pool complex under a giant dome. So on a nice sunny day; it was hot and muggy by the pool – and you felt like you were indoors, because technically, you were indoors. Also, I think I just completely forgot that Atlantic City is in New Jersey, and that a lot of people from New Jersey go to Atlantic City. And as much fun it is to try to guess how many of the few decent looking girls in the pool will have HALS (Huge Ass and Leg Syndrome) when they get out of the water (Answer: all of the them), I was wishing I was back on my roof deck in NYC after about 2 hours. Or basically anywhere else. But we were already in AC and on the list for the club later, so you know how the story goes.

After almost not getting into the club because our 28 year old British friend only had an international driver’s license, the club was very much just okay – (“Look, it’s a club! By a Pool! Who says AC isn’t glamorous?”). But it was the type of place where they intentionally make everyone wait an hour, but then they still let fat, ugly girls in. I mean, seriously? And not just one or two of them, but packs of them. Of course, I got way too drunk too quickly, and got kicked out for falling asleep in one of the club’s big lounge chairs. Which brings my total of getting kicked out of bars/clubs for falling asleep up to 25 or so, while I’ve only been kicked out of a bar once for inappropriate behavior (peeing in the ally right behind the bar, because the bathroom line was too long).

But then there was blackjack, and more drinks, and late night diner, and more blackjack, and more drinks, and talking to girls at 4AM in the morning, who had been ditched by their friends and were just flat out lost at that point, and then crashing for a few hours before the spa opened so we could be hung over in the sauna and drink a lot of that fruit flavored water, with real fruit in it, which for some reason, you can only get in spas. But I was literally so hungover that morning that I remember trying to make myself some tea, and then the top of the hot water carafe fell off, hot water poured over my hand, and it literally took me 5 seconds to realize that near-boiling water was pouring over my hand. I was okay though.

After this, we all made it to the buffet, which really was amazing. It truly was enormous – in that, I-love-America type of way. And they had every type of hangover food that you could imagine. Chicken noodle soup, four different types of Chinese food (including lo-mein), bagels with cream cheese + lox, potato latkes, funnel cake, pancakes, French toast, cheese cake, ice cream, corned beef, five types of eggs, fresh fruit, and all the other standard breakfast fare. Did you notice that I said “funnel cake”!? Which is probably nature’s perfect hangover food – yet you can never find it unless you happen to live near a state fair. And potato latkes! With apple sauce. It was like being in hangover-heaven, where you just thought about a food you want, and then you realize that they had it.

So as much as Harrah’s made me want to drink until I hurt myself, they were excellent at taking care of me when I felt my worst. Kind of like that awful girlfriend that you should break up with, but somehow date for years.

Overall Rating:  Two Stars.

PS – I should write hotel reviews professionally.


Posted in Awesome | Leave a Comment »