JewMitch

Just a Jew. Named Mitch. Writing about his feelings.

Giving blood; an HIV test and a T-shirt.

Posted by JewMitch on June 23, 2009

give blood

There was a blood drive going on one street away from my apartment building last Friday, and so I decided to give blood. I don’t know why more guys don’t give blood more often. Giving blood is a great way to pick up girls, get drunk, and save lives; all at the same time. Let me explain.

After you give blood, they wrap your arm with a medical dressing that’s similar to something you’d use to tape up a gunshot wound. I like to pretend that I’m a soldier on a battlefield when they do this. Also for some reason, the dressing always comes in a bright color, like green or orange. Not only does this dressing prevent you from bleeding all over yourself, but it also looks awesome, and if you wear a short sleeved shirt, it’s very conspicuous. Girls in bars are guaranteed to approach you and ask you about it.

This sets up a conversation that goes something like this:

“What’s on your arm?”

“I gave blood today and they told me I had to keep this dressing on for the next six hours.”

“That’s a great thing you did.”

“Yes, I know. I probably saved a few lives today. What’d you do today?”

“I went to work.”

“Oh, that’s not quite as good as what I did.”

And for bonus points, you can color coordinate your shirt to bandage.

Another great thing about giving blood is that it literally takes a pint of blood out of your system. Blood alcohol content is based on the ratio of blood to alcohol in your body. Therefore, if you take a pint of blood out of the human body, it’s much easier to get your blood alcohol level up. Which all means that I can usually get trashed on two beers after giving blood, instead of the normal ten or so. If you live in a major city, this can save you tons of money and make it affordable to go to fancier bars.

Finally, giving blood really does save lives. Currently only 3 out of every 100 people in America donate blood and one donation can save up to three lives. How pimp is that? Two hours of your time can save three lives and most people don’t do it because they’re scared of needles? The time to karma ratio on donating blood is through the roof. And best of all, giving blood allows you to be more of an asshole, and still feel like you’re a good person inside. Which is nice.

On top of all of this, you get a free HIV test and a t-shirt, which makes a great present (the t-shirt, not the HIV test). Here is a picture of the one I got on Friday and just gave to my friend Natalie for her birthday.

black history tshirt

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3 Responses to “Giving blood; an HIV test and a T-shirt.”

  1. Erin said

    I feel like the NBC “The More You Know” rainbow should appear … but you know I’m a supporter. June 30 next donation date.

    And finally – I know this is what you really want from this – Mitch, you are a good person.

  2. Natalie said

    Yes! I made the blog!

  3. Brian Wong said

    Congratulations on your blood donation. I have donated double red cells as well as whole blood to the American Red Cross.

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